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Lent Recap

Posted on 04/25/2011 by Benji Zimmerman Posted in Honesty, Personal, Spiritual | Leave a comment

By a show of hands, how many of you knew that Lent was 47 days?

Okay you can put your hand down now & that goes for me too!

After about 30 days of participating in a Lenten fast, I started to do some math and realized I would be about a week short of Easter if I only fasted from sugar for 40 days. I was confused. I thought Lent was 40 days? Well as it turns out Lent is 40 days, but during a 47 day period in which you are supposed to “rest” on the sabbath. That means if you are fasting from something you can eat it every Sunday! I had no idea! I had been fasting including the Sundays for the first 30+ days. Just goes to show you how much I paid attention during certain Bible classes in college. In light of the new information I decided to fast for the full 47 days rather than change part way through.

THE PRACTICAL:

In 47 days I consumed 1,283 grams of sugar or 2.82 pounds of natural and artificial sugar. I am sure that my calculations are off slightly for each day, so it would be safe to assume that I consumed under 1350 grams of sugar or just short of 3 pounds of sugar. In the 6 days prior to Lent I consumed just over 1,200 grams of sugar! I went from terribly unhealthy to healthy & balanced. I was able to scale back from 200 grams of sugar a day to just 27.3!

The obvious side effect of my change in diet was a result in significant weight loss. I weighed 199.9 on the first day of Lent. I weighed 186.4 on the last morning. The total weight lost 13.5 pounds. With about 2 weeks to go my weight was actually 183.7 for a total of 16.2 pounds lost, but the last two weeks have been such whirlwind that I have not been able to workout and have been eating my stress.

THE PLAN:

The plan was to eat sugars differently. The goal was to find time to read 45 minutes per day. With better levels of energy and a depth to my reading, my personal hope was that I would develop my relationships and cultivate friendships around me in light of the newness of what God had done in my life.

THE RESULTS:

I succeeded in eating sugar differently and it made me feel a lot more energetic. As a result of the change in diet (the first few days were rough) my attitude improved as well as my outlook on life. I felt a passion and restlessness for the great things of life like I hadn’t felt in a long time. Things were looking up and was excited to see what God would do in my life during Lent.

I was able to finish two books, Love Wins by Rob Bell & Soulprint by Mark Batterson and I am most of the way through three other books: Running the Spiritual Path, Wooden, & King’s Cross. I have really enjoyed getting back to reading and devouring books like I did before Alexis was born. Through the first 35 days I was right on target with reading 45 minutes a day during Lent.

THE CHANGE:

Lent was an amazing and encouraging journey until the last 12 days. I was drawing closer to God, my wife and my friends and enjoying the plan I had laid out; but our plans are not always God’s plans. On April 13, Sean Drozd, Ashley’s brother passed away and life took a different path. The sugar fast became harder to concentrate on and the reading plan fell off the to do list all together. Around the same time Alexis started teething and caught a cold. Sleep eluded me, diet didn’t matter anymore and surviving the ups and downs of each day became the only priority.

THE RECAP:

Lent started with a couple goals and I feel great that I was able to accomplish some of those goals by reading more, eating healthier and finding more positive energy. However, when Lent started one of the last things on my mind was what God sacrificed when He sent His son to the cross to die for our sin. I knew that was what Lent was about, but it was far from my goal to reflect upon. “Maybe around Easter I will think about that.” I said to myself.

Yet, at the end of Lent God’s sacrifice is the only thing I can think about. Jesus death was illuminated by the loss of Ashley’s brother. Putting myself in Ashley’s shoes or her parent’s role was a difficult and emotional task. What would happen if I lost my brother? What would happen if I lost my child? How would I react? What emotions would I experience? I can’t even imagine if I was asked to sacrifice my only child: I couldn’t do it.

Yet God did. For you. For me. For everyone.

Lent has been an emotional journey with extreme highs and tremendous lows but when it drew to a close on Resurrection Day I was flooded with emotion. God’s sacrifice trumps all the pain and heartache, all the sin and suffering, all the ups and downs. God gave so that we could live. I am so thankful for the sacrifice and although I know that there will be plenty of hard days to come I can walk confidently into the future knowing that God loves me so much that he makes all things new!

When It’s Your Turn

Posted on 04/14/2011 by Benji Zimmerman Posted in Personal | 2 Comments

A few weeks ago I posted about: what is the hardest thing you have endured? A few days later we watched and prayed for some friends who went through a horrible tragedy with the loss of their unborn daughter and the near death moments with the mother. Life is fragile and with any given day or any given moment the pendulum can swing in your direction.

Yesterday was our turn.

My father in law Frank has a older son from a previous marriage, Sean. Without expectation and without any warning at the age of 44, Sean Drozd passed away yesterday afternoon at his home in Venice Beach California.

Shock . . . Heartache . . . Sadness . . .

They charge in like a lion on the hunt. You never saw them coming and there is nothing you can do to stop them. Overwhelmed by the news my heart aches for my wife. During a period of Ashley’s life in Junior and High school her brother move out to Las Vegas and lived with them. Ashley and Sean built a special connection that will never be forgotten.

I will always remember the first time I met Sean when we went to Venice. He looked right at Ashley and said, “I really like this guy!” Sean’s positive attitude and energy were infectious! He always had a way of making you laugh and feel better about yourself. Although, Sean wasn’t always a great person and caused plenty of heartache for many that knew him in his past, but the Sean Drozd that I knew brought a smile to my face and will always be remember that way.

In January we were able to visit Sean and he was able to meet his niece for the first time. I am sad for Alexis that she will not ever get to know her Uncle Sean because he would have been a great friend and uncle to her.

We never know when it will be our turn to endure the hard stuff of life so in this time we are turning to God, our small group of friends, and our families to draw the strength we need to walk through the hard stuff of life. Over the next few days we will all be sorting through the pain and heartache, but I know that favorite memories and moments will emerge, however; right now it doesn’t take away the shock, the pain and the heartache for Ashley and her family. Sean was survived by his grandmother Gerda, his mother Angela, his father Frank, stepmother Pam and sister Ashley. Please keep each and every one of them in your prayers as the shock of what has happened settles in each of their lives differently. Pray that God’s peace will transcend all of the pain and heartache and comfort all of them in their time of loss and grief.

Be encouraged.

Posted on 04/03/2011 by Benji Zimmerman Posted in Spiritual | Leave a comment

In Paul’s first letter to the church in Thessaloniki , he offers some closing words in chapter 5.

“For God chose to save us through our Lord Jesus Christ, not to pour out his anger on us. Christ died for us so that, whether we are dead or alive when he returns, we can live with him forever. So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.”

AMAZING.

God chose to save us because of the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. God has done the work. Jesus has paid the price. There is nothing we can do to earn our salvation. God loves us no matter what we have done, where we have been and how we have lived. God has chosen us. That is simply amazing!

WORDS.

The amazing of what God did for us should result in action. The words? Words of encouragement and building others up. The amazing news of what God did should spur you to action. Not just on Sunday, but everyday. We can not do anything to earn a place with God, but because of what God has done we should be encouraging others and building them up.

ACTION.

Now go and do it. Who do you know that needs to be encouraged? Whatever it takes, be an encouragement to someone today!

What is the hardest thing you have endured?

Posted on 03/14/2011 by Benji Zimmerman Posted in Personal | 2 Comments

What is the hardest thing you have ever endured? Did you choose this thing or was it inflicted upon you?

In recent days I have not lived through anything remotely difficult, but I have been a viewer of three different types of events that have got me thinking. Although drastically different the events that I have seen transpire over the last few days have left me wondering what is the hardest thing I have endured through and at the end of my life what is the hardest thing I will have lived through.

On Thursday when the coverage of the earthquake in Japan and subsequent tsunami damage started airing on the late evening news I was struck with an overwhelming sense of heart ache for the people of Japan. I can not imagine what it would be like to live through an event of such magnitude. I have a really hard time relating to the people of Turkey, New Zealand, Haiti and recently Japan because I have never had to survive something so difficult. The death, destruction and devastation are nearly impossible for me to imagine.

On Friday I watched a documentary called, Running the Sahara. Three friends from around the globe decided to run across Northern Africa specifically the Sahara Desert. Their journey took 111 days and they ran over 4,300 miles or the equivalent of 170 marathons without taking a day off. The statistics of the event are so ridiculous that I can’t even process what they had to endure. The longest solo hike I have ever done is 43 miles. That is how much these guys averaged everyday for 111 straight days! I can’t even wrap my mind around the distance let alone the physical elements of heat, cold, sandstorms, etc that they ran through. These three guys have done something that I will never be able to relate too and it has to be one of the most difficult self-inflicted things I have ever heard of.

Lastly, on Sunday night my wife and I watched the movie Life as We Know It. During the movie the parents of a one year old are tragically killed and they leave their daughter to be cared for by their two best friends who absolutely loathe each other but eventually fall in love. The movie has some great quotes and has a few moments that made us laugh as parents, but the majority of the movie my wife and I were bawling. I can not fathom what it would be like if I lost Ashley or Alexis. Scratch that, I don’t even want to imagine. Although a fictional movie it left us both with an overwhelming sense of trust in God and a sadness for those who have had to endure such tragic events.

I don’t know if I really want to know what the answer to the question: at the end of my life what will be the hardest thing I had to endure? I don’t think I want to know that question because I know that I would not be prepared to hear the answer. God knows what is going to happen in the future and he knows the hardships we will all have to endure. After the last few days and the things I have seen my faith and trust in God has been increased and I have an overwhelming sense of peace this morning knowing that God is in control and that my life is in His hands.

The Drip

Posted on 04/08/2010 by Benji Zimmerman Posted in Honesty, Personal | 1 Comment

Last week my wife started having contractions. At a future time in the pregnancy this could be an exciting sign of things to come, however, last week was too early to have contractions. Slightly panicked we rushed off to the hospital. After an initial check-up from our doctor it was decided that we needed to spend two days there under observation. During the first day my wife was hooked up to an IV to make sure she was getting enough fluids. The first night as I laid in the pullout chair-bed while we both drifted asleep I remember looking up and watching the slow steady drip . . . drip . . . drip . . . drip . . . drip . . . and on and on it went.

All of us are addicted to something . . .

. . . I like to call it the drip.

All of us have a drip in our life. The drip can make you feel numb, happy, safe, tolerable, comfortable, intoxicated, out of control, in control, apathetic, lethargic, anxious, insecure, secure, sad, up and down all in the matter of a few minutes or a few hours. The drip is different for everyone: your drip might be the weekend shopping you do to mask your insecurities, it might be the five dollars you spend everyday in my coffee shop to get the caffeine you need to make it through another day, or maybe it is something with even deeper roots like gambling, drugs use, drunkenness or extra-marital affairs.

We all have hang ups, hurts and habits and that includes the people who heap the hot coals on our heads when we have stumbled along the road of life. No matter who we are we all are going to face something we don’t know how to deal with: unfortunately that is the moment when most of us choose the drip. When life is at a crossroads it isn’t always obvious which way leads to the drip and which way leads to life.

Many seasoned Christians want to put the crossroads in a nice little box and say that the choice is easy, but for someone like me who wasn’t taught what to do when life gets hard it makes the choices seem all that more blurred. Many of you are in the same boat. High school, college and life in general did not teach you how to deal with the hurts, habits and hang-ups. Right and wrong are easy to teach but pain and brokenness are hard lessons to deal with and can only be learned through experience. Do you find that the drip rarely shows its ugly head in the right and wrong but is almost always present in the pain and brokenness?

What does the drip look like in your life? What is the drip covering up? The root of the drip is the hardest place to go to emotionally but if you do the work you will be rewarded. The drip seized my life for years but with hard work it makes unplugging the IV so much easier.

Drip . . . drip . . . drip . . . the drip can go on and on until we unplug it.

What about you? Is it time to unplug the IV?

Broken Hearted

Posted on 07/12/2009 by Benji Zimmerman Posted in Other | Leave a comment

What does your heart break for?

A few days ago I posted this on Facebook and I gathered a few response . . .

Lack of tolerance
Human trafficking
People who don’t know Jesus as their savior
Thirsty people who can’t get clean water
Little kids born into terrible situations
Loss of a loved one
Others that are hurting
The elderly
Abused, neglected & starving children

I think that deep down inside of all of us there is something that stirs something in our soul that says, “That is just wrong!” I know at numerous times my heart have broken for the atrocities of this world. Hungry children, unclean water, sex-slavery, genocide, civil wars, human slavery, death, or disease; you name the injustice and there is someone out there whose heart breaks for that particular cause. So what does your heart break for?

But beyond that, I think the better question is: what are you doing about it?

The people that posted the previous list on my Facebook people that are doing something about the things that they care about. But the question is not whether they are moved to action, but whether you and I are? I hate apathy. But yet it bleeds out of me. I spend my time doing what I want: reading, blogging, running, working, and out with my wife. My actions represent my heart.

Over the years there have been plenty of things that have broken my heart, but my actions have done very little about it. I am tired of being apathetic. I desperately want to make a difference in the world.

My wife and I are venturing into the world of developing a non-profit that fights drunk driving by providing free rides home to bar patrons. Making a difference in the world requires small steps of action. This is my wife and I moving from apathy to action.

How about you? What breaks your heart? What are you doing about it?